Victor Buono
Chief Ironbottom
Tony Danza
Pony Lambretta
Jamie Farr
Studsky
John Byner
Len 'Hatch' Hatchington
Gavin MacLeod
Lt. Nojack
Buck Owens
Sheriff Tim MacSkye
Connie Stevens
Sgt. Salty Sanderson
Jimmie Walker
Parks the Pusher
Burt Young
Lt. Palumbo
Marty Allen
Det. Starkos
Richard Deacon
Mr. Burnice
Gunilla Hutton
Raquel
Roz Kelly
Virginia Trickwood
Liz Torres
Mrs. Palumbo
Don Adams
Narrator (voice)
Mason Adams
Willie the Wino
Mitch Kreindel
The Man in White
Michael Delano
Thug
Tessa Richarde
Sophia
E. Wetta Little
Marilyn
Mel Blanc
Chickie Baby (voice)
Allen Case
Kindly Doctor
W.T. Zacha
Truck Driver
Jack Lindine
Rookie Cop
Colin Hamilton
Fitzhugh
Harriet Medin
Great Lady
Carle Bensen
Dandified Gentleman
Iris Adrian
Candy Store Proprietor
Linda Lawrence
Girl #1
Kathy Clarke
Girl #2
Twink Caplan
Hooker #1
Muffi Durham
Hooker #2
Tanya Boyd
Stunner